Elbows DOWN, Canada

Potential economic devastation isn’t fodder for a cute PR campaign

Mayor Olivia Chow takes a selfie on stage, capturing the Elbows Up rally crowd behind her. #cdnpoli #Toronto #ProtestMania pic.twitter.com/94aBHVHUQs

— Caryma Sa'd – Lawyer + Political Satirist (@CarymaRules) March 22, 2025

Elbows DOWN, Canada. This is not the way adults negotiate important situations. International relations is not like chirping opponents at a hockey game. Potential economic devastation is not appropriate fodder for a cheerful public relations campaign by politicians who pick up generous paycheques.

In February, following Justin Trudeau’s disastrous first foray into communicating with newly-inaugurated American president Donald Trump, I was so shocked by Trudeau’s lack of finesse or even common courtesy that I arranged an interview with business leadership and communications specialist Paul Kearley. Kearley writes a popular column “Walk the Talk” for his clients and other professionals, which Road Warrior News is proud to carry.

However, before I could even get that article written, the rude exchanges between Trudeau and Trump began escalating at dizzying rates. Then Premier Doug Ford waded in; vice-president JD Vance entered the fray; and the world watched on February 27th as Trump and Vance had a knock-down, dragged-out shouting match with Ukrainian leader Vladimir Zelensky live on video in front of an Oval Office packed full of media.

The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it….don’t kick over the beehive.”

–Dale Carnegie

Next, magically and mysteriously, Mark Carney was installed as the leader of Canada’ Liberal Party and is now presenting himself as the Prime Minister of Canada. Astonishingly, his people skills appear to be even worse than Trudeau’s.

More has happened even since February, but I’m going to just pick this moment in time and history to stop watching in dazed horror, and get down to writing.

“To succeed in conversation, what we want to find is points of agreement. We do not voice opinions in order to convince the other person: we voice opinions in order to be heard,” said Kearley, president of IBC Impact Group and a Managing Partner with the Dale Carnegie Business Group.

After Trudeau’s first catastrophic set of exchanges with Donald Trump, I turned to Kearley for the alternate view on the Canada vs. United States trade collision. He has worked as a business coach at the highest levels for almost 40 years; he is a transformational speaker, entrepreneur and author of over 350 articles and 7 e-books. I really value his insights and perceptions.

“When you’re trying to have the kind of conversation in which opinions are involved, opinions are actually the smallest part of the whole issue,” he explains.

“To succeed, what we want to find is points of agreement. We do not voice opinions in order to convince the other person: we voice opinions in order to be heard.

“When someone is voicing their opinion, the most important thing we can do at that moment is to shut up and listen. Get all of the opinion: listen to the whole thing and then clarify. Ask questions so that you can identify points of agreement,” Kearley advises.

“You might say something like, ‘Well, that’s an interesting point. Why do you say that? Why is that important? How does that work? Educate me.’

 “Just be really, really, really curious. And then, as you’re clarifying, and really listening to find points of agreement, cite those points of agreement:

‘So, so what I’m hearing you say is, if we do this, we’ll get this…Am I hearing that right?’

“Find points of agreement, reframe the discussion, and move on.”

Kearley has specific special advice for the conversations in which you have no option but to disagree.

“If you have to disagree, then you disagree after you’ve searched valiantly for points of agreement. Finish up with your opinion last.

“And,” he notes, “Don’t ever voice an opinion unless you have evidence to back up your point of view.” Evidence can include facts, statistics, examples, or testimonials.

Expressing an opinion without evidence to support it, he explains, means the conversation becomes a meaningless one of “he said, she said.”

“And that will start more arguments than you and I both can imagine.”

My evidence of Kearley’s opinion is the last two months in North America. It’s been brutal, and professionals paid by taxpayers to negotiate crucial world affairs need to do better.